https://zoringroup.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=14&t=16046
This tar.gz file contains:
desktop-login.ogg - the sound that plays after you have logged in.
desktop-logout.ogg - the sound that plays when you logout or power down.
system-ready.ogg - if only this were possible! This file uses the same voice in desktop-logout which states “Welcome! Please identify yourself.”
Taken from a brilliant release based off Ubuntu 13.10, Ultimate Edition Oz Diamond B-II
“Welcome! Please identify yourself.”
I Am Your Father’s, Brother’s, Nephew’s, Cousin’s, Former Roommate. 
Maybe for Dads Army theme:
“Halt, who goes there, friend or foe?”
“Halt, who goes there, friend or foe?”
Give me a couple beers and then I will let you know. 
Yep. That rhymes well. You may now get a “Poet” badge. 
Hey, I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it. I can make it rhyme anytime. HAHA
Actually ya, I am kind of a poet, but I’m a private one if you know what I mean.
I is the General, with a snore to wake a store! 
Pop a balloon sometime… That will cure your snore, cause you sure won’t be asleep no more.
Spaceballs? 
Spaceballs… brake for no one!
Yeah, I bet she gives good helmet