so just now ive run
sudo apt update && sudo apt upgrade -y
like ive done countless times before
but now it seems stuck halfway for bout 10min now , this never happened before
my internet connection is good
how can i cancel it without doing damage maybe ?
grrrrr...!
nevermind , it just finished . but process bar wasn't moving like before
all good now
I would suggest to check what needs updating before continuing. It's very tempting to include that -y flag but it's best to know in advanced about what is going to change. Even if you don't understand what it all means and it reads like gibberish at first, you'll get more used to it after some time.
Some updates that tend to take a lot of time are things like Libre Office which are quite large and include tons of smaller little packages and libraries for things like translations, etc. Another classic example are kernel updates which need to be compiled on the spot.
And, well, internet does sometimes slow down from time to time.
yes it got stuck on the libre office update
from now i'll leave the -y out , and read lol
i'm just wary i leave something to not update ,and it should update
my opinion about updates were always that the developers releasing the update probably knows better than me , so i always just update everything blindly .
after all, it's been drilled in users heads ...update update update 
That's a good thing! Issues with updates do happen from time to time but it's definitely preferable over not running any updates for months at the time.
In this case, I think it's a good idea to start familiarizing yourself with what exactly is being updated. For example, now you know that Libre Office may take some time to update, and the next time you run the update (without the -y flag) you can decide to skip it for the moment in case you don't have the time. Or, you may be interested in updating another package separately for the same reasons.
Just took a look at one of my VMs and here you can see what I mean. There are a lot of updates available but since it's not really a priority for me since I use this for testing, I can pick and choose what I want to update right now.
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